Monday, August 26, 2013

The "C" Word

It scares us. It's hard to embrace. It is almost always uncertain. That ugly "C" word...CHANGE.

Even though it can be hard, I've always managed to embrace change and find excitement in the newness of things. Moving or changing your residence can be difficult. With the exception of moving in 1st grade, each of the times I've moved, it was with great excitement about what was ahead. From my parent's home to my first apartment, which then became the first residence my husband and I shared. From that little apartment to our first home. From that first home to the one we live in now. One that was selected with the little ones in mind.

Other times it is the change from a single person to a married person or vice versa for some people very dear to me. Or changing from a couple to a family of three, four, five or more. It was exciting to change from a single woman to a wife. Despite planning, I felt poorly equipped to tackle the role of mother. I'm pretty sure most women do; it's our nature. But, even that change was one that was coupled with excitement.

The church we attend and have been members of for almost six years now, is adding an additional worship service that will differ in style from those previously offered. I must admit I've scoffed at those that find this change drastic, unimaginable or detrimental. "What's the big deal?" I think to myself. I guess because I've never really struggled much with change in my life. This seemed no different; not to mention I'll more than likely enjoy the new worship style.

So, why all this rambling about change? It's because I've met my struggle, people, and it's name is kindergarten. Honestly, it's probably a whole host of other things I have going on. Why does everything start up at the same time? It's like we're all blissfully enjoying summer with hot days running through the sprinkler, picnics with friends, movies at the drive-in, popcorn for breakfast, long summer nights, popsicles on the porch after dinner, catching lightning bugs in the yard and then BAM! Hello, early mornings, socially acceptable breakfasts, lunch packing, homework, football practice, bible study, awana, exhaustion and reasonable bedtimes.

Getting moving in the morning was a lot easier when it meant just making it to preschool by 9 a.m. I'm having more than a little trouble embracing the new normal, which is alarms, waking blissfully sleeping children, and often times grumbling. I know we've had it good. I'm not complaining. I'm just revealing my current struggle, friends.

I looked up the definition for change:

to make the form, nature, content, future course, etc., of (something) different from what it is or from what it would be if left alone

That first part seemed to make sense. I'd heard it before. Change is making something different from what it is, but that second part jumped out to me. It's also making things different from what they would be if left alone, altering its future course. Perhaps it's my faith in an incredible God, but I have to believe that change is necessary. If things were left alone, those early morning snuggles watching Curious George wouldn't be so precious in my memory now. I'd have little reason to look forward to Saturdays.

Just as change is inevitable and necessary, so is growth. As much as I loathe these early mornings and long afternoons waiting to pick up big brother, I believe God has something in store. Praying He keeps showing me ways to celebrate this new season of change.

1 comment:

Salena said...

Laura, what a perfectly heart-felt post. You really summed up exactly how I feel, too (minus having my own child in school). I was at home all summer, enjoying the days with Chandler, doing as we pleased, and then BAM...everything started up at once. Everything changed. All the responsibilities of being a working mom and wife came barreling down on me, and it was hard to handle at first. I barely had a chance to breathe. Thanks for sharing this. It's nice to know that I am not alone.